بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
وصلى الله على رسوله الأمين وآله الطيبين الطاهرين وأصحابه المنتجبين
السلام عليكم
The following is a quick example that one of the brothers and i were discussing and إن شاء الله i felt that the beneficial fruits of that discussion could be shared with some of the brothers and sisters here.
So Allah(swt) says:
وَيَسْأَلُونَكَ عَنِ الْمَحِيضِ ۖ قُلْ هُوَ أَذًى فَاعْتَزِلُوا النِّسَاءَ فِي الْمَحِيضِ ۖ وَلَا تَقْرَبُوهُنَّ حَتَّىٰ يَطْهُرْنَ ۖ فَإِذَا تَطَهَّرْنَ فَأْتُوهُنَّ مِنْ حَيْثُ أَمَرَكُمُ اللَّـهُ ۚ إِنَّ اللَّـهَ يُحِبُّ التَّوَّابِينَ وَيُحِبُّ الْمُتَطَهِّرِينَ
[2:222] Saheeh International
And they ask you about menstruation. Say, "It is harm, so keep away from wives during menstruation. And do not approach them until they are pure. And when they have purified themselves, then come to them from where Allah has ordained for you. Indeed, Allah loves those who are constantly repentant and loves those who purify themselves."
(note: i don't really like any "translation" that much; this is just the default one that i have)
The part of the verse that i want to emphasize is this:
وَلَا تَقْرَبُوهُنَّ حَتَّىٰ يَطْهُرْنَ
And do not approach them until they are pure
What exactly does this mean?
When we look at other ayahs on not going near things, we see stuff such as:
وَلَا تَقْرَبُوا الزِّنَىٰ ۖ إِنَّهُ كَانَ فَاحِشَةً وَسَاءَ سَبِيلًا
[17:32] Saheeh International
And do not approach unlawful sexual intercourse. Indeed, it is ever an immorality and is evil as a way.
So don't even go NEAR zina
And we know from other ayahs and hadiths that this includes things which may possibly (but not necessarily) lead up to zina. So for example, hadiths tell us to to be alone with a woman, not to shake hands with women, and Allah(swt) tells us to avoid our gaze in (24:30).
So don't even go NEAR zina
Similarly, Allah(swt) says regarding alcohol:
يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا إِنَّمَا الْخَمْرُ وَالْمَيْسِرُ وَالْأَنصَابُ وَالْأَزْلَامُ رِجْسٌ مِّنْ عَمَلِ الشَّيْطَانِ فَاجْتَنِبُوهُ لَعَلَّكُمْ تُفْلِحُونَ
[5:90] Saheeh International
O you who have believed, indeed, intoxicants, gambling, [sacrificing on] stone alters [to other than Allah], and divining arrows are but defilement from the work of Satan, so avoid it that you may be successful.
And there's hadiths saying not to even sit at a table where there's alcohol on it. It was narrated that ‘Umar ibn al-Khattaab said: The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Whoever believes in Allaah and the Last Day, let him not sit at a table where wine is being drunk.” Narrated by Ahmad, 126; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Irwa’ al-Ghaleel, 7/6.
So don't even go NEAR alcohol, not even sitting at a table where it's being drunk.
So going back to the topic at hand, we are told not to go near our wives when they are having their periods. Does this mean that we should be like the Jews and completely isolate our wives when they are in this condition and literally not even go near them, as the Bible says in Leviticus 15:
19 “Whenever a woman has her menstrual period, she will be ceremonially unclean for seven days. Anyone who touches her during that time will be unclean until evening. 20 Anything on which the woman lies or sits during the time of her period will be unclean. 21 If any of you touch her bed, you must wash your clothes and bathe yourself in water, and you will remain unclean until evening. 22 If you touch any object she has sat on, you must wash your clothes and bathe yourself in water, and you will remain unclean until evening. 23 This includes her bed or any other object she has sat on; you will be unclean until evening if you touch it.
?
For a person who is looking at both the Quran and the Sunnah, this isn't really a big deal, because there are a number of hadiths, both Sunni and Shia that say you can do almost anything you want (with certain conditions) with your wives during their period, except actually entering in them. Indeed, some scholars have said that this is the ijmaa' of the Muslims, as al-Fakhr says:
اتفق المسلمون على حرمة الجماع في زمن الحيض، واتفقوا على حل الاستمتاع بالمرأة بما فوق السرة ودون الركبة
But a person who is only looking at the Quran may object to this, bringing up 17:32 and 5:90 saying that don't go near them (wives) means don't go near them so we should be like the Jews and completely isolate women having their periods completely.
It may be said to this that one of the meanings of قرب (nearness) in the Arabic language could literally be sexual intercourse, as could be understood in the hadith of the 3 that were left behind:
إِذَا رَسُولُ رَسُولِ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم يَأْتِينِي فَقَالَ إِنَّ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم يَأْمُرُكَ أَنْ تَعْتَزِلَ امْرَأَتَكَ فَقُلْتُ أُطَلِّقُهَا أَمْ مَاذَا أَفْعَلُ قَالَ لاَ بَلِ اعْتَزِلْهَا وَلاَ تَقْرَبْهَا. وَأَرْسَلَ إِلَى صَاحِبَىَّ مِثْلَ ذَلِكَ، فَقُلْتُ لاِمْرَأَتِي الْحَقِي بِأَهْلِكِ فَتَكُونِي عِنْدَهُمْ حَتَّى يَقْضِيَ اللَّهُ فِي هَذَا الأَمْرِ. قَالَ كَعْبٌ فَجَاءَتِ امْرَأَةُ هِلاَلِ بْنِ أُمَيَّةَ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم فَقَالَتْ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ، إِنَّ هِلاَلَ بْنَ أُمَيَّةَ شَيْخٌ ضَائِعٌ لَيْسَ لَهُ خَادِمٌ فَهَلْ تَكْرَهُ أَنْ أَخْدُمَهُ قَالَ " لاَ وَلَكِنْ لاَ يَقْرَبْكِ
قَالَتْ إِنَّهُ وَاللَّهِ مَا بِهِ حَرَكَةٌ إِلَى شَىْءٍ، وَاللَّهِ مَا زَالَ يَبْكِي مُنْذُ كَانَ مِنْ أَمْرِهِ مَا كَانَ إِلَى يَوْمِهِ هَذَا
There came to me the messenger of Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) and said, 'Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) orders you to keep away from your wife,' I said, 'Should I divorce her; or else! what should I do?' He said, 'No, only keep aloof from her and do not cohabit her.' The Prophet (ﷺ) sent the same message to my two fellows. Then I said to my wife. 'Go to your parents and remain with them till Allah gives His Verdict in this matter." Ka`b added, "The wife of Hilal bin Umaiya came to Apostle and said, 'O Allah's Messenger (ﷺ)! Hilal bin Umaiya is a helpless old man who has no servant to attend on him. Do you dislike that I should serve him? ' He said, 'No (you can serve him) but he should not come near you.' She said, 'By Allah, he has no desire for anything. By, Allah, he has never ceased weeping till his case began till this day of his.'
So this should be enough for the average Muslim who says that you can approach your wife during her period; you just cannot have sexual intercourse. This is because he has the Arabic language supporting him, hadiths, and the ijmaa' of the Muslims on this issue.
Whereas for the Quranist, all he has are other ayahs from the Quran and the Arabic language. And the thing with language is that it basically only gives you possibilities. So looking at the ayah, it's a possibility linguistically that ولا تقربوهن means literally not going near her, and it's also a possibility linguistically that it's only specifically talking about sex and it would be hard for the Quranist to specifically say it's one or the other without a clear daleel either way.
This is just a small and humble understanding that i pray is correct and i ask Allah(swt) for forgiveness for anything that is incorrect but insha'Allah my point about the importance of looking at both the Quran and Sunnah
والله أعلم